Live Like We're Dying

So the world is suppose to end tomorrow according to the Mayans and the people that believed the prophecy. As for me, well it'll just be a normal Friday where I'm going to hangout with my friends to celebrate my bestie's birthday. Turning seventeen at last. I can say that time flew by so fast like just two weeks ago I was just done with my last exam paper and here I am planning my outing for tomorrow. I duno what the future holds for me but I hope the people that I care about will be in it. I guess that's all for now. If the world is gonna end tomorrow well I can say that I had a great year behind me. And I'm gonna live it like it's my last day.

Angel To You ( Devil To Me )

I dunno why but I just feel like dedicating this post to my best friend. I know it's kinda lame but I can't help it cause I miss him a lot. So why the title? well, let's see. The first time I met him, he looked like the most innocent thing on the face of this planet. He was quiet and shy and not at all talkative. But that totally changed when I got to know him better. He's a loud and bubbly person and fun to be around with. He's shy to the people that he'd never met before and would just keep his mouth shut. That's why to most people he's like an angel. But whenever he's around me well he's a totally different person. he's totally himself and I know that I can be myself in front of him too without having the fear of getting criticized or looked down upon. I'm very lucky to have met a great friend like him. He's my thunder buddy and I totally appreciate it. I hope our friendship can last all the way through all the obstacles that would come our way cause what ship never sinks? Friendship. Thank you for always being there for me whenever I feel like I'm alone in this world and thank you for understanding me. I love you thunder buddy and I hope we stay friends forever. Thunder buddies for life!

I Miss You

You know the feeling you get when you miss someone terribly and you can't do anything about it? Yeah, that's what I'm feeling right now. Exams are over and so is school. I'm free till next year where I'll start a new chapter in my life. I'm not quite ready for it. I don't want to lose my current friends especially my two best friends. They mean a lot to me. And if I were to lose them, that would really put a dent in my life. I just want to spend the remainder of my break just hanging out with them and have some fun before I start college. Somehow or rather, I'm not really looking forward to starting a new life.

Reckless and Relentless

Had a great two days with the two besties yesterday and today. I kinda missed them already. It was great fun just being ourselves and doing things that we loved doing. Didn't sleep for the whole night. And it was just really fun. The constant laughing, the giggles and the snores. I would miss all that. It feels kinda quiet without them now. But I'm looking forward to the days where I can hangout with them all day and just be as reckless as we can be to enjoy life and just be happy.

Two Worlds

You know what sucks the most? When your own mother compares your friend to another friend. It feels like you don't respect my decision on who I choose to be my friends. Please don't compare them to my previous ones. The ones who told me that they would always be there for me, ended up leaving me. So what's the point of being friends with those kind of people? I know you don't really like it when I hangout with them cause of your first impression on them. But please respect my decisions.

Tearing Me Apart

I really hate this feeling of jealousy. I mean is it even normal in the first place? He's only my friend nothing more than that which means that he has every right to flirt or be with any girl that he wants to. And that would be the moment when I have to let him go. I'm not ready for that. Had a little argument when I found out that this friend of his wanted to study with him. I have nothing against him going but jealousy sets in. Cause I still remembered that moment when I saw him with that girl and it's like a nightmare all over again if that were to happen. Seeing him so happy with that girl, it broke my heart cause all I could do was just sit and stare. It's like I meant nothing to him that time. It's my feeling of insecurities and jealousy that's causing me to be like this. And I hate it. I have no right to control his life so why should I care in the first place right? I guess I'm just a selfish person that wants him all to myself. But the truth is, I'm just afraid that he would find someone prettier, smarter, funnier and better than me. I just wish he knew how much he means to me.

One In A Million

Today was a great day. Spent time with the friends and it was definitely a much needed break. Did all those crazy things and it made me realize how much I really don't want to lose them. Or part ways with them. Especially my two best friends. How much they really mean to me. They've always been there for me and I'm really thankful for that. They're definitely one in a million. This short post is dedicated to the both of them. Thank you so much guys. Love you lots.

Little Things

You know, he has always been my weakness. And he doesn't even know it. Every little thing about him, his smile, his laugh, his eyes, his smell, everything about him means everything to me. I can never stay mad at him for too long no matter what kind of bullshit he puts me through. Yeah sure, I've wasted so many tears on him and he doesn't even know it. I could never tell him that because he always said that I should not waste my tears on him. But he would never know how I feel. Sometimes, I wonder is it all worth it? All the tears, all the times I stayed up just waiting for his reply which never came at times, getting ignored at times, being teased but when I looked at his face, I could never bring myself to hate him. For once, I wished he could at least experience what I'm feeling every single day. People say that I should move on, but saying it is way easier than actually experiencing it. Having him as my best friend is better than not having him in my life. And I'll just keep it that way then and just push my feelings away and hope that it fades. The second we became friends, was the moment I fell in love. But the moment you called me a friend was the second my heart broke into a million pieces. Too bad, you'll never want to help me pick them back up.

Friday Night

Kind of a slow day today. Was supposed to head out to KL, but the sister got sick so we're heading out tomorrow instead. Am looking forward for the exams to end. No more studying till college, hangout all day with the friends and doing whatever crazy things I wanna do. Too bad I'm always running short of money. It's great to have a week long break from exams. Am planning to go hangout with friends this Wednesday and I hope that everything goes according to plan. I mean I wanna ask my friend but what if she asks is it okay to bring her fling partner? No dude it's not okay. My other friend really wanna talk to you. And I hope you won't hate me if I dragged you long to meet him. How I wish every night was Friday night?

I'll Take My Chances

Exams are going okay. I have five more papers to sit for. I really can't wait for it to end and then it would be freedom for real! Well, the bitch is acting kinda weird lately. She started talking to my friends whom she said she would not talk with but she went back on her words. I'm not hating her for it or anything but sometimes, I'm just scared that the same thing would happen again like last time. My sister and my parents said that she's only doing that because she has no friends and she wants to make amends again. Moving on, my other friend. Something about her has changed and she's kinda becoming something that she said she won't be. I love her a lot but it's like I rarely know her anymore. I admit that it's my fault cause I don't hangout with her as much as last time since I'm hanging out with my other friend but she's always chatting with this one guy. I know she just broke up but isn't it better if she lay off the radar for a few months before moving on. I know that I have no rights to control her life but I just don't think it's right to move on that fast. And come on, you only met that guy in what a week? And you're already in a fling with him? I mean as long as you're happy then I'm happy too but like I said before isn't it too fast? You only met him and you already got into a fight and blaming yourself and all. What happened to that previous guy that you liked? Have you forgotten about him? I don't want to say it to your face because I can't bear to hurt your feelings but you're just so different now. It's like you're dying for attention from guys. And that is so not you. Whatever happened to my friend that was always happy-go-lucky and dishing out advice to me to take care of my heart when it comes to boys? I miss that.

Catch Your Wave

The big day is tomorrow and I'm nervous like shit. I feel like I don't have enough time for anything and I feel like I didn't manage to cover all the subjects and topics that are coming out. I'm panicking like shit and it is so not helping me. I'm so blank right now, that's why I'm onlining instead of studying. My parents said I'm too stressed out and my sister said that I studied too much and need a break. Hmm, honestly I dunno what to do now. Anyways, moving on, my friend had a confrontation with me and my best friend. So, the whole thing started because he felt left out. I mean that's kinda lame when he's the one that started this whole thing over something so small. I dunno if I can forgive him for what he did to my best friend. So, I'm ending it here, let's just pray that I can pass my exams with flying colours.

Just The Girl

So, everything's okay. SPM is in 9 days, well that's what they all say. I've been studying my ass off and I need a break for a while. My friend has totally changed. Like I had no idea what happened to him but I can say that he has changed. I dunno what went wrong but he rarely talks to us anymore. I thought I was the only one that thought he was annoying and how he drastically changed but apparently, I'm not the only one. I'm not bitching or anything but please dude, you and my best friend are no longer together, you have to give her space. I dunno how many times I've mentioned this bit seriously, it's so not cool. Like yesterday, after she left you came over to us. What? Too cowardly to even talk to her? She moved on and you also have to move on at the same time. She's not the only girl in this world you know. She might be just the girl for you but she deserves someone better than you.

Good Day

Had a bad day today and it was partially my fault. I guess. I'm half to be blamed for it. Sometimes, I can't help but to be sensitive when it comes to certain issues. Maybe, I'm just not used to getting tease a lot and yeah I'm kinda sick of it. But like I said before, no matter how many times he pisses me off, I can never get angry at him and I dunno why. I guess you can say that he's my weakness. But no matter how many times we get into a fight even over very petty things, we still and will always try to patch things up no matter what. I guess that's the coolest thing about our friendship. And yeah I'm looking forward for tomorrow because I will take everything into my stride and pray that it would be a good day.

Hold On

Gosh just 2 more weeks and I'll be sitting for the biggest exam of my high school life. The exam that will determine my future and where I'm heading to in my life. Gosh, talking about it already made me stressed out. Tomorrow's the seminar and honestly, I'm really lazy to go for it but the only reason that I'm going is to see my friends and maybe get a few tips. How I wished it was my teacher who's in charge of the session tomorrow but unfortunately it's not. Owh and the guy that likes me? He didn't even try to gain my attention today. I guess he finally got the cue that I'm not interested in him . Thank God. But it so ain't cool getting teased all the time. And I still don't get why some people think I'm together with my best friend. I mean, can't a girl be close friends with a guy? Guess the only thing I can do right now is to hold on huh?

Let Me Take You There

I never thought that late replies would be a concern to him. I guess he's just like me in a way. I can't stand late replies and neither can he. Sometimes I feel like if he were to reply late to me, he's talking to someone better but that's just one of my insecurities. Honestly, I dunno what our relationship is. Friends or what? Cause we act more than friends but less than lovers and that really confuses me. I just wish he can tell me what we really are. I know it's only a small matter but I just don't want to think about this all the time. I just wish he can take me into his world, at least that's how I'm feeling right now.

Figure It Out

Finally it's the weekend. And school starts next Wednesday. What a killjoy. Well, technically, I just wanna voice my dissatisfaction with a couple of things for now. Number one, my grandma. Just because we plan to move doesn't mean that we don't love this house or something. This house has provided me with a lot of memories and yes just like you I feel sad to leave this house but the decision's been made and there's nothing you can do about it. And don't blame my dad for this whole ordeal, please realize that he did a lot for you. Secondly, my stalker. Dude, if you keep on talking about me then grow some balls and confront me instead. It pisses me off to no end, when you're all talk on Facebook but when it comes to the real thing, you have your tail in between your legs. And no you don't own me so please don't try so hard to impress me. I only have my eyes on one guy. Lastly, my friend. Do you know the word privacy? Or it doesn't exist in your dictionary? Don't you know it's rude to read people's messages no matter how close you are to that person? Yeah and you read his texts with me. So not cool dude. Like why do you need to do that? Is it because you can't text my best friend like last time? Move on please. She's looking forward to the future and so should you. All in all, these people should just figure out themselves.

Gimme A Chance

So, the parents are away for four days and yeah I can smell freedom! Nothing much happened today. I actually studied and did a couple of history exercises. I know it's kinda lame but I miss him already even though it's only been a couple of hours. And yeah I cried again today. I blame my mood swings but it was because of him. I sometimes wish that his mood won't affect me but it always does no matter what and that sucks. I just wish that I can just tell him everything that I've kept for so long instead of keeping up a facade in front of him. But I just don't wanna grab the chance even though it has always been there.

Write You A Song

So, today was kind of an annoying day. I mean my friend totally ruined my day. He was okay in the morning but he became a bitch later on. I mean seriously what the hell is your bloody problem? You and my best friend are no longer together so stop controlling her life. You can't do that anymore. It's so not cool when you get jealous when she talks to other boys. I mean what's your bloody problem? I really find that letter that you gave her really sweet but that's not how you win back her heart. Just give her space will you? Stop following her and always being at the same place as her. You might think it's normal but it's pissing her off. I'm just ranting cause I don't wanna hurt your feelings if I were to tell it straight to your face. If I was a singer, I would totally write a song about you.

Tearin' Us Apart

Nothing much happened but I just wanna update my blog cause I'm addicted to typing out my feelings. Life's not all that rosy. Dad's been in a bad mood since so long and I feel like he blames me for everything. He's trying to control my life by deciding when I should stop texting and can use my phone. He even took my phone away a couple of times. Come on, I'm a teenager and that's what we do. Ask a normal teenager and they would reply the same thing as me. We do this every single day. Don't compare the teenagers of our generation to those of your generation please. Times have changed. The more you try to control my life the worse it can get cause then I'll start to hate you and this could tear our relationship apart. Please daddy, why can't you just understand me?

So Damn Clever

I guess it's been a really tough week for me. Yeah, a few good things happened but I never felt like this before. The moments that I had with him just makes me forget about this whole thing, about the pain that I feel inside of me, the uncertainties, the insecurities and most of all, myself. My parents especially my dad is being really harsh to me. I'm a teenager please don't control my life. I know that I'm only 17 and naive but please. I know you're worried about me but everything would be alright. You have no idea how much this affected me okay? Having sleepless nights and been losing my appetite just thinking about it. I wish I have nothing to worry about anymore. I wish I can be a little girl again where I don;t have to worry about anything and anyone and where I'm able to be myself and no one can say no.

Making A Memory

Life has never felt sweet and bitter at the same time. A lot happened. Regrets, happiness, wishes, emotional breakdowns but it's all a part of growing up. Life was never a fairytale. Everything happens for a reason and in the end, you'll only end up stronger and not weaker because that's what life is all about. I learned my lesson and this will forever haunt me that's for sure. It will forever remain etch in my brain as a bittersweet memory.

Friends Don't Let Friends Dial Drunk

I just dunno why I've been feeling happy for these past couple of days. Must be because of him. I feel like we've become closer than before. I've been staying up till four in the morning just to keep him company and we just talked about the most random stuffs. Yesterday was a little emotional. I never actually opened up to a guy before, he was my first. It was embarrassing to tell him how I really felt when we hugged but I was glad to know that I was his first and he would always protect me no matter what. I never felt this way before. And yeah his hugs are slowly becoming my drug too. I really miss him so bad. I just wished he was right beside me now, playing the guitar and singing whatever song pops into his head. Then we would laugh and talk about anything and then we can go to the park and push each other on the swings. I wish, but it won't come true. I just miss my best friend.

You And Me

I guess everything is okay now. I'm kinda looking forward to the future and not thinking back about the past. What's passed is pass and there's nothing but to live in the moment and look forward to the future. Had a long talk with him yesterday and kept him company till the wee hours of the morning. I guess it's a step forward isn't it? I don't mind being just friends as long as we get to be together just you and me. You said you're not ready yet and I know this might sound really corny but I'll wait for you. I'll show you the ropes of everything and anything that you need to know to the best of my capabilities cause that's what friends do. I really value our friendship so let's be Bonnie and Clyde together. just cause we can.

Hate I Really Don't Like You

So, I had everything sorted out. He said that I'm the first girl to make him feel this way. To care for him and treat him this way. I never realized how much he valued my friendship with him. I felt freaking guilty cause I made him worry so much about me. I cried a lot these past couple of days all thanks to him. But it's all sorted out now. He told me that if I were to hate him, he deserves it. How is that possible? I can never bring myself to hate him. He means everything to me. He told me he can't bear to lose me. It was really, really, I just dunno how to describe it. It felt so surreal. I just want him to know that I love him so much and I hope we remain friends. I don't wanna lose you and I hope that you would try your best to hold on to me too.

Come Back To Me

I'm really confused right now. It feels like my feelings are being played. My friend said that the guy that I liked, only like me as a friend. I find it hard to believe cause if it was true he would tell me himself and not ask someone else to tell it to me. He made it more suspicious when he said he can't tell me if he's around. Like what the hell does that mean? Just last week, he was getting jealous over my other guy friend putting his head on my shoulder, just a few days back he told me to take care of myself and just two days back I told him my dream and he said that it was just a dream and everything would be okay. My friend told me to not believe a single thing he said cause it could probably be a lie. But if that were to happen, I'm expecting for the worst. But I just hope that it's not and this is all just a bad thorn in my life. Just I hope that your feelings for me is real. I just want you to come back to me.

Our Time Now

Trials are over! I don't count Arts, PE and Civic as part of trials so that means freedom till November. A lot happened I guess throughout this week. Last Sunday, we spend time just talking about us. And on Monday, he told me a little bit about his background which he rarely tells anybody. It's kinda surprising that he's actually opening up to me, somebody he just met. But I guess it's a sign of trust since I trusted him to not tell my deepest secret. And I hate making him angry over something that I did. Well, technically I'm not sure whose fault was it. My friend slept on my shoulder and he saw and his face was disappointed? He kept on glancing at me but my friend said he was really pissed. I cried thinking that I'm the one that caused this. But it's not. He was just jealous but he can't say anything cause we're just friends. And today he drew a heart on my paper without him realizing it but he blushed when I pointed it out to him and tried to covered it up which was bloody adorable. Somehow, I feel like he's the reason I look forward to every single day. He makes me smile and laugh even though I'm always the victim of his pranks but that's what I love about him.

Karma

Do you ever get the feeling of ultimate guilt over something that happened? Yeah, that's how I'm feeling now. Apparently, his things went missing and I'm partially to blame for it I guess even though he didn't say anything about it. I won't talk about it since I'll feel guilty all over again. If I thought I have enemies that only consist of one girl, well apparently I think this one Form 3 girl hates me. It's not my fault that I always hangout with him or something and stop giving me that bloody glare when I walk with him or something. You have a boyfriend so go suck his face or something. And don't think I'm dumb when you gave me the look of wanting to punch my face when you saw me wearing his hoodie. Apparently, you're just like the attention seeker who apparently glares at me and my best friend whenever we hang out with boys cause she has no one left other than her fake friends. Karma's getting back at you.

Insecurities

I hate that feeling of feeling insecure and in doubts over everything. I just tend to over think about everything which is not a good thing. Nothing is actually happening between the both of us but it just got me to over think this whole thing. Tomorrow will be a month since we confessed to each other. I know I'm lame for keeping tabs but I'm a girl so that's to be expected. Another month closer to be with you. I should stop worrying and focus on my studies instead. Mama and Papa are not pleased with me since they think I'm falling deeper in love with him so I'm gonna prove them wrong. It feels kinda disappointing that they don't trust me but what hurts is that they won't even tell me anything and seems to be like pointing fingers to him because of my lack of interest in studying right now. You should never blame him. If there's a person who should be blame, it should be me so please stop making him look like the bad guy. I'm the one who's falling too hard and too fast.

Ignorance

Seriously, you are fucking pissing me off. Well, I'm sorry that I'm invading your breathing space. But, guess what? I don't care! Yeah, I'm going to prom, so why should you care? I know that you have over 200 guys lining up for you and I have none so? That doesn't mean anything. I'm just waiting for someone. The only reason that you have that bloody amount of guys lining up for you is because well, to put it straight, you're easy. Get what I mean? I honestly, still don't know what I did to you to get you all pissy-offish, but really, my life is way better without you in it. I can't believe that I used to call you my best friend last time. If only I knew what would happen now, I would have avoided you like the plague. So since prom is like 3 months away, I'm gonna save up my money unlike you and buy myself a nice dress unlike you who'd probably be buying it from the pasar malam, get myself a nice date who would actually wanna go with me, unlike you, enjoy myself with my best friend, unlike you and your fake friends but most of all, I'm gonna enjoy myself and not give a flying fuck. Ignoring you is way better than to think about what-ifs and making my life more miserable.

For The First Time

I dunno why I'm so afraid to lose you when you're not even mine. Yeah sure, we confessed to each other but how do I know that you won't lose your feelings for me? I'm so confused right now. Every time, I think of you, it puts a smile on my face but at the same time, I would cry. Who would have thought that you could have such an effect on me like this? Yes, I get jealous whenever you talk or converse with other girls but it's not me being clingy, it's just me being afraid to lose you. Am I falling too hard? Maybe I am. I wish for once, you could delve into my mind and feel everything that I'm feeling. You have no idea what you can do to me. I never had the opportunity to tell you how much you mean to me. I know we've only known each other for just a few months but ever since you walked into my life, I felt like I have something to look forward to. The days when I get to see you are the best ever. Everyday is my favourite day when I'm with you. And the days without you, are the longest ever. But maybe it's just me that's feeling this way. I want to go up to you and tell you how much I've grown to love your smile but I just can't. The promise that you made is not just hurting you but it's also hurting me because you have to stick by it and I have to follow because I don't want you to break that promise. These next few months will be the longest in my life. I hope that God would give me strength to get me through this. And I pray that you would keep your promise because I've waited for you. I'm never gonna give up on us. I'll do anything that I can for us. I would. That's my promise. I would love you and accept you. I might not be the best but I'll be everything more than what you deserve . I want to be your first and last love. I want you to know that I'll always be here for you even if you do not know it. Sometimes, I wonder why would God let us meet when all of us are about to go our separate ways? Maybe God has something in store for us and he wants us to be patient. I hope that you're the one for me. It's like first love all over again. The butterflies I get every time I see you, the blush staining my cheeks every time someone mentions my name, the beating of my heart whenever you're near me. That's how I feel. Your eyes, your smile, your scent, your laugh is becoming your drug. I'm writing this down so I can see it and read it over and over again to remind myself how much I love you. You're my pain, my medicine, my baby, the reason for my smile, my tears, the reason I smile to myself, the reason I listen to all the slow songs, the reason why I tend to look my best, you're my air, my blood but most of all you're my everything. Distance might keep us apart but my feelings for you will remain. I want you to know that I can go on forever but then it'll never end. My friends often asked me why I like you. I have no answer cause what I felt for you is overwhelming and indescribable. They don't see what I see in you. If only you could read this then you would know my true feelings. I can't say I love you now but someday when the time comes, I hope I will and i hope the person that I said it to would be you. You're my Prince Charming and my knight in shining armour. You saved me from myself and showed me the beauty of the world again. I've waited so long to open my heart to someone and it's you. I've only anted you even when there are others waiting for me. They won't understand why I chose you but they don't have to. I just pray that if we were meant to be, you'll treat me right and love me for who I am, through the ups and downs that would make our relationship stronger and hopefully lasts. I love you.

Moments

It's been like two weeks since we confessed to each other and we still have a long way to go till December. I know that I have to focus on my exams first but I guess I can't help thinking about him. Every moment that we spent together is my favourite moment. The small gestures such as the smiles, the giggles, the laughs, they are all my favourite memories. When we sit next to each other, there's just this feeling that I can't describe. His smell is intoxicating to me and I've grown to love it so much that it became a drug to me. I know that maybe I'm giving my all to this whole thing when he doesn't even know anything about it but I'll do anything to make it work and I pray that nothing will come between us cause I can't bear that thought. I love him...

Distance

I miss you so damn bloody much that it's driving me crazy. I really don't know what to do anymore and it's only been three days since I last saw you. I know that this whole thing is new to you and I'm willing to wait for you, no matter how long it takes. I don't want to come off as clingy or annoying so I'll try my best to make you comfortable. I'll do whatever it takes just to make sure that this whole thing is not just a dream. I really like you a lot. Scratch that, I love you and you mean everything to me. And this whole thing is killing me slowly. I don't want you to leave me. I really don't want to. I just hope that the only thing that would actually come between us is the distance between our houses but not our hearts.

With Ur Love

I'm still having butterflies whenever I think of you. I mean, the feeling still won't go away and the worst part is my parents knew. Cause they saw us yesterday. Yup, the secret's out but only between me and my parents. Our secret's still safe. I hope. I mean my friend just doesn't like the fact that I have feelings for you but you know if he's my friend he just has to accept it. Somehow the days seem longer without me seeing you but what can I do? I really wanna spend more time with you. I feel like I could do anything with you, be myself with you. I can do anything with your love.

Don't Let Me Go

If I could describe my feelings right now, it would probably come in the form of a book. I feel so happy, relieved, glad, it's like a whole whirlwind of emotions. It's totally indescribable. Now, I finally know what they meant by being happy just because of one person. I can't reveal anything cause we made a promise and yeah, I'll leave it at that. I just pray that you won't let me go as easily as anything. I love you.

Dear God

Okay, I know it's like forever since I last updated but I was really busy. A whole lot of things happened in July. First, was the hangout. Last Friday, the four of us hung out like usual but this time it was for breaking fast. I dunno what my exact feelings were on that day but I guess I was the happiest person alive. My crush made it and I guess it was one of the best moment of my life where I got to just be there with him. And when he held my hand, it was indescribable. It was everything I've always wanted. His hand was so warm and it made me feel safe. Waking up beside him was like finally realizing that it was not a dream. But too bad that we would only remain as friends. And today, he showed another side of him. The caring side. He lend me his hoodie cause I was cold and it was really sweet and if I could I would totally bring his hoodie back home with me but I can't cause I don't think that's what friends do. I dunno what are we exactly? Are we friends or are we a bit more than that? Cause we've been texting nearly everyday now and I really don't want it to stop. You're always on my mind and I know that I'm nothing more than just a friend to you. Dear God, sometimes I wonder why would you let us meet knowing that nothing will come out of it?

Stole My Heart

Monday again. School was normal today. Then headed out to KL and now I dunno why I feel kinda anxious like something's about to happen but I dunno what which is causing me to have a minor panic attack. Moving on, I dunno how to describe my feeling right now. I had this long talk with my sister about my crush and I know this sounds kinda corny but I can't imagine going to college and meeting someone new cause I only want him. I guess you can say that I wish we can go to the same college. And the suckiest part is I can't hangout with him this Friday since I have installation and it's the last day before fasting month starts! I really love my life. There goes my chance of spending time with the guy who clearly stole my heart.

Save you Tonight

Had a really weird dream last night. I dreamed that it was the zombie apocalypse. I blamed the Resident Evil trailer. Well, it started like this. I went to the  movies with my friends and I wanted to get in the elevator to go home when a police came and stopped me, god knows why. Then the whole elevator was crowded suddenly with people trying to flee and I still didn't know what was going on at that time. When I got out from the elevator the whole place was on fire and I was trying my best to get to the car while trying to avoid fireballs? Okay, that part must have been from Hunger Games. Then, my mum drove off the car and I met my friends who were on their way to escape too. Then, it flew to another point of view, where a group of my friends were stuck in a shop and had to battle the zombies and one of them got stabbed but was still alive, then it flew back to my point of view where I got down from the car and was freaking happy to see my crush still alive. I mean seriously? Apparently he was trying to escape the zombies too. Omigod, what the hell is wrong with my brain?

Same Mistakes

Saturday. And I'm not going anywhere thanks to my stomach cramp. Thank you so much monthlies. I still can't get over the whole incident. I'm not the type of person who forgive and forget. Yup, I tend to keep my emotions to myself cause I just happened to be that type of girl. I dunno what else to write since I'm really in no mood to talk about it.

Everything About You

I guess it's kinda sad that I didn't get to spend that much time with you this week but it's okay at least I still get to be your friend. Moving on. I just wanna voice my dissatisfaction. You're like one of my closest friend ever and I totally appreciate for everything that you've done for me but then by you saying something to me that kinda hurt my feeling well, it's a totally different story. I admit I don't have any feelings for you and by not answering I might have given you false hope but thinking this whole thing is a joke is totally not cool with me. I might be smiling like an idiot but deep down it's like a sword just pierced through my heart. Yeah, that's how much it hurt. It might be nothing to you, but I have feelings too you know. But maybe you don't get that part. Owh and I dunno if this is true or not but if you think that by finding  replacement would help you get over something then go ahead and be the same thing that you accuse me of. Just saying. If you stumble upon this blog entry, I just wanna say I'm sorry but I just need to let it out and besides it's my blog, I believe I can write about anything here.

I Want

Had a great ending to this week. Went for our usual bubble tea on Friday and yeah, it was one of the highlights of my week. I was a tad disappointed when he told me that he won't be coming for the IU and the carnival and honestly, I really wasn't looking forward to it at all. I know it's kinda lame when it's my own club's IU but I guess I can't helped it. But out of the blue, he showed up and I swear to God, my heart just beat a million times faster. So, we kinda hangout for a few hours and he kinda went shirtless when he was dared to get dunked and yeah, that was my first glimpse of his bldy. God, I sound like a horny teenager. Yeah, it was amazing. The feeling I had when I was closed to him and when he touched my hand even though he was wet. I really didn't feel like going back yesterday. Last night, I happened to have a dream about him where his brother revealed that he had a crush on me and everybody was kinda asking us to go for it. I really want that dream to come true. I hate this feelings that I have for you. It makes me vulnerable but happy at the same time.

Taken

Euros are officially over. Congratulations Spain for winning but next time Germany will dominate you guys. I guess now I don't have to wake up to go watch football anymore but I would totally miss every second of it though. But nothing beats missing you. If i confess, it would be weird because I don't want our friendship to be torn apart. But if I don't, then I would totally regret it. Life huh? And I can't bare the thought of you being taken by another girl. I know that I don't own you or anything but to me you're my everything.

Tell Me A Lie

I am really confused right now. My friend just confessed to me and said he has feelings for me but the truth is I only think of him as a friend and nothing more than that. I feel bad if I tell him the truth that I like another guy. The problem with the other guy is I dunno if he likes me or not. He's giving me mixed signs and I really dunno what he's thinking about. He's just really sweet and funny and my dad said if he makes me happy then he's okay with it. My life is practically so confusing right now, I don't even know what to think anymore.

I Wish

Should I go to school tomorrow? If I do, then I have to stoe in Arts class which is definitely not on top of my to-do-list. But if I don't go tomorrow, then that'll be three days of being absent. Dammit. Guess I have no choice but to step a foot in school. And I can't wait for Friday morning! Germany versus Italy baby!!!! I just wish that they would win. May the odds be ever in Germany's favour :)

Up All Night

School tomorrow. I can't believe Euros are coming to an end. I'll miss staying up all night just to watch the matches and arguing with my family about football. At least, football season is starting soon. Up next is Germany versus Italy. I have a feeling that it'll be a tough match but Germany will prevail. Cause I really wanna watch Germany versus Spain, in which Germany win of course. And I'm absolutely lazy to go to school tomorrow. I just dunno why. I guess that's life huh?

More Than This

So, last Thursday the four of us hungout as usual and we ended up playing Snakes and Ladders and it was fun actually. I won twice and I was flattered when you called yourself my knight in shining armour and how you would come to rescue me from the snakes. How you said you were my Prince Charming and I should always wait for you because eventhough horses do not climb ladders you would still rescue me. It was really sweet and I wished that everything you said was true and that you really meant it but of course not. Who am I kidding?

One Thing

Last Friday, my friends and I headed off to our hangout spot. And he was there. It was thrilling actually. I sat beside him in the bus and I couldn't help but blush throughout the whole journey. He was jus so close to me. His hand was just that close. I just wished he would have grabbed it instead. And when he whispered in my ear, it was... I can't describe the feeling. I miss him already and knowing that he smiled when I said I love him, it melted my heart but he would only think that I love him as a friend and nothing more than that.

Gotta Be You

So, I went to tuition today and he was there. With a new haircut which makes hil look even younger than before. It was really cute. We didn't really talk but it was okay. At least, he smiled at me and vice-versa. Moving on, we have a shooting tomorrow about this FrogAsia. I don't really know what it's about but it only involves my class and might be aired to other schools which will be embarassing. And guess who's the first person that signed up? Yup, the attention seeker. Who else? Obviously, she would want people to know her cause she only craves for attention. Besides, she's a loner so she would need all the attention in the world. Just saying.

What Makes You Beautiful

I was a bit jealous when my friend told me that she hungout with my crush last Thursday but it's not like I can turn back time so I can be there just to see him right? So, school started today and it was just a waste of time going since we didn't even study anything and they're having a book exhibition in school tomorrow. Hm, I hope they have some nice books I can buy. So, from now on, I'm planning to post up titles just to make my blog look nicer. I know the title might not make sense but I'm in the mood for One Direction, so what do you expect? And I might be posting up quotes that I got from the internet and fanfiction as well cause I'm cool that way. I just don't want to lose it that's why. Hehe. Owh, and maybe song lyrics too, so let's start with what makes you beautiful. -Baby you light up my world like nobody else, The way that you flip your hair gets me overwhelmed, But when you smile at the ground it ain't hard to tell, You don't know, You don't know you're beautiful, If only you saw what I can see, You'll understand why I want you so desperately, Right now I'm looking at you and I can't believe, You don't know, You don't know you're beautiful, Know, But that's what makes you beautiful. That is how I view you because for me, you're beautiful to my eyes just the way you are. :)

School is starting tomorrow and I'm so not looking forward to it. I mean, whoever heard of having only two weeks as a summer break? Not me, that's for sure. So, on Wednesday, I watched Hunger Games with my sister for the fifth time. I know it's a lot but when you love the movie, books and especially actors, you are willing to do anything just for it. So, Euro started two days back. And this morning was Germany's match versus Portugal. And Germany won! I'm like so happy with the fact that they denied Portugal victory. And Netherlands lost to Denmark. Hm, this Euro ought to be exciting.

Holidays are nearly over and it is so unfair. Done with my report. Fuck, I don't even know what happened since none of them actually bothered to tell me what was going on. Never mind, it is life afterall. So, I went out with my friends last Saturday and my crush was there. It was great just to see him during this long break. Just spending time with him, hearing him laugh at my lame jokes, and to just be near him. Too bad, he would never know how I feel for him. Sometimes, I envy my friend with the fact that she has a boyfriend and how loving they really are and then I look back at me. I've been single for two years and my first boyfriend wasn't exactly the best. Haihs, I wish I don't have to be lonely anymore.

I Miss You

I miss my grandpa already :'( It's been almost a week since he passed away but somehow I just can't accept the fact. There's no one else to accompany me whenever I stay up to watch football, no one to motivate me to do better in my exams, no one to make lame jokes at the dinner table, no one to argue with, no one to cook me weird food and most of all there's no more of the comforting presence knowing that my grandpa's safe and sound. But all that's gone now. I know that I'm not that close to him but he means a lot to me and I will forever miss him. I love you grandpa, may you be place among the good people. Rest in peace, I will always pray for you. Love, your granddaughter.

Holidays are finally here! Can I scream yes!!!!! So, I still hate that bitch. Haha just realized what a sore loser she really is by hanging out with the people that she hates because she doesn't have any friends. And you're the one who called me the loner. Well, I hope karma is getting back at you! All those bullshits that you've done to me yeah it's slowly making its way towards you. So since you're in camp right now, I hope everyone blatantly ignores you and realize you for who you are bitch! Phew, I feel so much better now.

It's been a long week. My "friend" is being a bitch again. Yeah, you weren't invited at all but you just barged in and yes, we did not want to hangout with you that's why we escaped from you. But blaming my friends and saying that you wanted to beat me up? That's all talk and no play bitch. You called me a coward? Hah! You're the real coward. If you have balls, you'll confront me yourself and not ask other people to do it for you. A lot of things happened between me and my crush too. We spend quite a lot of time together this week and it has got to be one of the best moments of my life knowing that he's there with me. Anyway, kinda pissed with my grandma and I'm really in no mood to talk about it.

Stole My Heart

I guess a lot kinda happened this week. My friend and I kinda made up but I'm still in doubts over her sincerity. I've been seeing him a lot and everytime I see his face it just lights up my world. I dunno if he likes this one girl but you know if she makes him happy then I'll be happy for him. But sometimes I just wish that he knows my feelings towards him. It hurts that I'm just nothing to him when he means everything to me. And since he's spending a lot of time with that girl. She's just lucky I guess. But if ever I were to find out that she hurt him then I guess I'll totally kill her or something. Unrequited love just sucks when he's not aware he was the one who stole my heart.

Karma's a Bitch

I dunno what's up with my friend. Just cause I was absent from school, she called me this bad word. I mean I'm used to it cause she calls everybody bad names but somehow this was just a bit too much. Like, I have no idea what's her problem. Maybe she doesn't have any friends that was why she's pissed with me? I dunno what the heck is she thinking inside that brain of hers all I know is that none of my friends came to school today and maybe she was all alone in school. Boo-hoo-hoo. That means you are a loner huh? Karma's a bitch and maybe it's finally making a round towards you for all the shits that you've done to me. No need to act all innocent and asking if I'm okay after our "big" fight. Yes, the whole world was against me. I lost my friends all thanks to you. Are you happy now? Yes, you succeeded in making my life a living hell, but I pulled through and here I am now. I hope you'll get what you deserved soon. And yeah by the way, the guitar is not your property. It belongs to my friend so give it back to him. You've kept it for so long already like it's already your property or something. I dunno if the guitar's safely back with him or not but all I know is that, it's not right for you to keep a person's thing for a long time and I'm still waiting for my Roxy t-shirt. Talking about you just make me sick, so I'll try my best to refrain from talking and bitching about you.

So, I won't really say a lot happened this week but I guess in a way it did. I went out on Tuesday with my friends and I was really reluctant to go at first but thank god I did if not I guess I won't get to spend time with him. I mean to him I 'm just a friend but I like him more than that and I guess you can say that it sucks that he doesn't know how I feel towards him. As much as I would love for him to know how I feel, I don't think that it's right, I mean I have a thing against his brother who just happens to be the biggest jerk on earth. Sometimes it kinda hurts that he might just talk to me because he's friends with my friend but I guessed it can't be helped. Had a dream about him last night and it felt so real, like I was really in that dream with him and my friends. I guess that's life huh? It hurts to love someone and not be loved in return, but what is the most painful is to love someone and never find the courage to let the person know how you feel.

Life's a bitch and my sister is one of them. I love her, I really do but sometimes I just can't stand her. In a way, I prefer to be alone. Sometimes, it feels better whenever she's not around. I mean I dunno she just changed a lot and sometimes I feel like I rarely know her anymore. I just hope she would change back to the sister that I know.

So, I had the weirdest dream last night. I can't really remember what it was but it was kinda cool. Moving on, I'm kinda pissed off at the president again. I mean I don't even know there was like a meeting or something and what do you think that I'm so free to stayback after school tomorrow? Hey, I have a life you know and it doesn't involved around you the whole time. I mean the bloody project is in 2 months and we have exams coming up, how the heck are you gonna raise funds and plan out the projects and shits. It's already nearing May for god's sake! You guys are so last minute and you start blaming me whenever my projects are a failure which is only once. Haihs, that's what you get when bimbos manage a club.

Just got back from KL. Watched Hunger Games again and omigod, I just fell more and more in love with the movie and the whole series of books. I can't wait to get a hold on all of it. I find the movie kinda deep and seriously what kind of bloody mentality is it to let children fight till the death? I mean I would do that to all the people that I hate but definitely not kids. Anyway, moving on I wish I live in the US now or something. I mean I would do anything to meet Alexander Ludwig. He's just so perfect and beautiful to my eyes. Haihs, too bad I'm just a normal girl who he doesn't even know exists. It's a sad world.

I hate my monthlies! I'm currently suffering from stomach cramps right now and it ain't fun. There's school tomorrow but I didn't start on anything which includes homework. Dammit, I'm just so lazy to do anything right now. Anyway moving on, went to the Curve today and watched Battleship. Man, that movie was awesome! Taylor Kitsch wasn't that bad looking and the scenes and actions were damn awesome. So Battleship done, Hunger Games done that leaves me with Wrath of the Titans and Street Dance. And I can't wait for Avengers!

Went for LMFAO yesterday and it was fucking awesome! It has got to be one of the best concert that I've ever been to! Had fun with two of my friends and my sister. Haha and I didn't really realize how scary a mall actually looks like at night and all the ghost stories that we ended up telling each other. Moving on, I'm still obsessed with Hunger Games. And I really wanna watch the movie again. It's like a million times better than Twilight. Hope my dad hears my plea to go out and watch the movie again tomorrow.

So, it's been a long time since I blogged. A lot happened. First of, I feel like I'm surrounded by liars and fakers all around me. I don't mind if my friends wanna keep secrets from me but then keeping it cause you know it's wrong but you don't want me to scream at you? I'm not dumb. Please, stop acting like a slut. I know you better than that. You can just say no to her but you're just too weak to say NO when it comes to her. You barely know that guy. What if something were to happened to you? Don't you think I'd be worried sick? Yeah sure I might scream at you for being an idiot but if you still wanna do it then it's up to you cause I did my best to give you my opinion and point of view. Friends share with each other but somehow I don't think this is happening among my friends and I. Sometimes, I wish my life was much more easier where I don't have to deal with all this crap.

So, right now I'm really confused. You start acting like how we used to before this whole thing happened. My friend told me that you wanted to take full revenge on me just cause I can't make it to your place last year. Dude, I bloody apologized last year like what else do you need? You said you pity me cause you've been hearing all this shit stories about me from other people. Well, here's a fact. I don't know that many people and people don't know me. Unless they're my own friends then it's a totally different story. I wanna talk to you but you're too coward and insists on having a talk through the phone. Grow some balls, please.

I don't get why holidays always go by so fast but school's ticking like a snail. Went to Malacca on Friday with family and friends. It was an amazing trip and I wouldn't mind going all over again. So, I finally got the resigning thing out of my chest and I feel much better now cause I don't have to worry about anything anymore. I don't really know what to update now. So yeah, chao.

So, I've finally quit interact. Yup, QUIT. The club which I have so much passion for and loved but this is too much. I know that winners don't quit and quitters don't win but I'm not a freaking saint with a patience tolerance as high as the Burj al-Khalifa. That bloody president called me irresponsible and said she's disappointed with me? Fuck off. You have no idea what I'm going through. All you want is fame and glory where everyone knows you. You want everything to be perfect so that you can take all the credit. Well, let me tell you. You suck. You can't handle stress well and start panicking even at the slightest error. A good leader would know how to fix that with a straight mind and not like yours that winds up like the winding road to Cameron Highlands! The club will be better without me. And trust me the club now sucks. It wasn't how it used to be. Might be cause of the leadership or something. I mean seriously if you guys are not satisfied with me then just point it out or something. I bet you guys just can't find a person who's willing to take up the position. Haihs, I'm not dumb. Whatever. I'm just too tired to care. At least now, I can finally rest and study.

So, I'm practically the happiest girl on earth right now. Manchester United won and Manchester City lost! That means Man United are on top of the table! What makes it better is the fact that all of my teams won! Bayern Munich won 7-1, Real Madrid won 3-2 and Manchester United won 2-0! How wonderful is that? Maybe I should start being a sports reporter from now on. Moving on, just heard the news about a girl who went missing on March 1st. Her body was found burned. Like really bad. Prayers goes out to the family. But not trying to be mean or something but let this be a lesson to all of us to never let any kid under our care go off without ant supervision. And the fact that there are rumours saying that the mother was Face booking was just too much. Personally, still not trying to be mean, have the decency to look out for your kid, Sure the shop's like 50 meters away and the neighbourhood is safe but come on this is not Sweden or Switzerland where you can go out at 3 in the morning and be safe. So, I guess that's one lesson learnt.

Stressed! School holidays and I'm stressed up again! Ah, the wonders of being a student huh? So moving on. I don't want to think about anything school related at all. I can't wait for the match tonight. I hope MU is gonna win. Who am I kidding? Of course they will win! B.E.L.I.E.V.E. Anyway, I'm really addicted to Safe and Sound, and I really can't wait for Hunger Games. I have like a whole lot of bucket list of movies that I wanna watch before the end of the long week holidays. One of them is Star Wars in 3D which is never bound to happen.

Finally it's the school holidays. A lot happened while I was gone. First off, my so-called "best friend" told my other friend that if I don't apologize to her, she would take total revenge on me. I mean what the hell does that even mean? Are you gonna bitch slap me or bitch kick me or what? Cause I know that you said you feel like bitch slapping me just by setting your eyes on me. Or second are you gonna ruin my reputation by spreading rumours about me to other people? Which you are doing now and trust me it makes you look like a total idiot cause eventually people would know you for who you are. Yeah go ahead and take full revenge on me because I am not going to apologize to you unless you grow some balls and confront me for my mistakes instead of sending other people to tell me off. Cause that's what cowards would do. So good luck with your life cause I don't see you going anywhere. You don't even bother to study and ace your exams cause you think money can solve everything. Sorry dude sure the world revolves around money but not everything can be solved by money. And F.Y.I. you look like a homeless person, NO OFFENSE. Maybe you should try showering, ironing your clothes, washing your face, comb your hair and maybe buy yourself a perfume or something :)

Sunday means school day tomorrow. I know it's my last year of school but I'm just so lazy to get my ass to school. Had a great time visiting IJN yesterday and spending time with my family singing karaoke. I also dreamed a really weird dream last night. I dreamed that I was hanging out with my sister and her best friend who happens to be Cesc Fabregas. I mean seriously? We went to get some chocolates and ice cream then I dunno what happened. God, I'm so lame.

So, I was cut off from civilization for nearly two weeks and I'm back! It feels so good to be online. I'm really stressed out right now. I actually thought of quitting from my post in interact but you know winners don't quit and quitters don't win. That's the motto that keeps me going now. Well, and my friend is up to her own self again. BFF stands for Best Fake Friend and not Best Friends Forever. Dang, that is so true. Well, I think that's it for now.

My phone decided to die on me. And now I have to use my mum's phone. I don't like it. I want a new phone but I dunno which phone should I choose. Decisions, decisions. The match on Monday was tense. The fact that we were 3-0 down but came up to a draw was amazing. Believe that's what we do, like the true United style. Next match is against Liverpool and I hope for the best. GLORY GLORY MAN UNITED!

It's the weekend! Finally! So, I've been spending 3 days without my parents and that is like awesomely awesome! I went to school yesterday and it feels good to be back. I miss talking and laughing with my friends. So, my sister is being a bitch. I mean yeah sure you're in college now but that doesn't mean that you can have all the freedom that you want. You still rely on my parents for money. If you really want to be free and independent then start earning your own money. You know how grandpa and grandma always look forward to the weekend because that's when you'll be back at home but clearly you don't realize that cause obviously for you your friends are more important than your family. Please stop being selfish and only think about yourself. Other people has feelings too you know. Sometimes, it feels good that you're no longer here cause then I don't have to worry about you being in a bitchy mood and always finding something to complain about. If you read this posting, you're probably hating me. But this is what I'm feeling right now and it's only here that I can type out my feelings.

I Miss School... Weirdly

So, I got sick during the holidays and guess what I'm stii sick! I've been missing school for four days and sure I really love to stay at home and just chill but I knoew I'm missing a lot at school. Anyway, I'm watching the match right now. And it's the penalty part where Berbatov scores! Haha lucky me. So, I feel like technically half a traitor now. Ok, maybe 5%. I mean I can't help it that I find David Silva from Manchester City, cute and adorable! Ok, I guess I just have to get over it. So I think that's all for now. Chao.

So, holidays are finally here. Thank god, I finished most of my homework. School was okay but god, it was like hell to me. It' so fun when you act nice for 5 minutes but then you act al bitchy for the rest of the day. What the fuck is your problem? If you really have a thing against me then seriously confront me lar coward. No need to bitch about me to my friends and have them go against me cause you're just a loser. You can't force me to perform with you! I can say no for all I want to. You're just forcing me cause you don't have anybody who wants to perform with you. And by threatening me to sleepover at your place just so that I can repair my mistakes to you is just bullshit. You can't fucking threaten me. Go ahead and ruin my whole high school life for all I care. i wish you the best of luck in your life. And FYI, you nak sangat kawan and kahwin sangat dengan mamat German tu kan? Haha kau tunggu jer lar. Aku nak tengok sangat. Entah2 since you nak international sangat, you'll end up with the last person you ever expected. Only then will I have the last laugh at you like what you always did to me. HAHAHAHAHA!!!

Backstabbed

You know it's such a nice feeling when you found out that your so-called "best friend" happened to backstabbed you. I honestly don't know what I did to you till you're damn angry with me. You said that I'm using you to get to know more guy friends? Please I wouldn't want to be caught dead with the type of guy friends that you hangout with. You have no idea how much it hurts when you're trying to get my friends to go against me. How would you feel if I were to do the same thing towards you? No need to act nice in front of me, I can see right through you. You said that I'm an attention-seeker? Look at yourself first. You hate my hair? Fuck off, have you even seen yours in the first place? You said I copied your style, personality and is trying damn hard to be you? Please, don't be so self-centered, I wouldn't want to be you. You said I'm jealous cause I don't have any international friends? So what? At least I don't go around to every single guy that I see and start screwing with them. Yeah, you're cheap and that's a fact. You hate me, so what? I have my own life. You want to ruin my life? Go ahead, people will soon see you for who you are. You said that people only tolerate me cause of you? Haha say whatever you want, but you don't know what some of them are actually thinking about you. I wish you the best of luck in your life cause if you continue on like this, you will be getting nowhere. I'm sorry that I can't be what you want me to be. And you have to accept that cause this is who I am and if you can't accept that then too bad. But I wish you remembered all the shits that I've gone through with you cause apparently you don't. So that's it for now. And you don't have to this reverse pyschology shit. Grow some balls and confront me cause I'm not going to admit my mistake just cause you want me to.

Unfair

So, I don't get the fact why my school is damn bias. Okay, every year we have Japanese students coming in to our school for a visit and cultural exchange programme and the cool thing is they only choose the Science students to be the hosts. How effing lame in that? Come on, give the arts students a chance! We're not that dumb you know and in fact we watch and actually speak Japanese unlike those people that is only there so they can act all cool with those Japanese people. Bitches all of them are. Sure they say that only the best and brightest gets to do all the fun stuff. Bullshit! I'm so sick of the school treating students unfairly like we're fucktards or something. And to this one teacher out there, I fucking hate you. Don't think you can control my fucking class just cause you're the teacher cause you obviously don't know us newbie =.=

Stressed Out!

Second week of January and school and I am already stressed out. Interact is totally killing me. reports here and there, I don't even know what is happening right now. Some of my subject teacher sucks! No offense. I can't help it but if ypu really wanna teach then do so with passion and not just teach and change topic in less than five minutes. Football is also stressing. Seeing Manchester United win was awesome but as a fan, I would really love to see their stellar performance again. I hope the days would definitely look up again and not cause me so much stress. I need some time off man!

Happy New Year! Omg, I can't believe it's already 2012. Omg, I'm growing old. So new year. nothing new happened. Pretty much same old, same old. So, I have a thing for listening to Japanese horror songs from their games which creeps the living daylights out of me but the idiot that I am actually like to listen to it. Okay, chao-ing now to scare myself.