Hate I Really Don't Like You

So, I had everything sorted out. He said that I'm the first girl to make him feel this way. To care for him and treat him this way. I never realized how much he valued my friendship with him. I felt freaking guilty cause I made him worry so much about me. I cried a lot these past couple of days all thanks to him. But it's all sorted out now. He told me that if I were to hate him, he deserves it. How is that possible? I can never bring myself to hate him. He means everything to me. He told me he can't bear to lose me. It was really, really, I just dunno how to describe it. It felt so surreal. I just want him to know that I love him so much and I hope we remain friends. I don't wanna lose you and I hope that you would try your best to hold on to me too.